Thursday, July 18, 2013

$@it Just Keeps Happening!

Well, as it turned out, we had a very nice 4th of July.  Belfair Gardens put on a fun celebration from lunchtime until around 3PM.  You can see that Mama started out with her head in her hands.....why enjoy yourself when you can be miserable!!  But, it was so festive and the staff in such a celebratory spirit that she couldn't keep up the sour mood.  At the end of the day she actually acknowledged that it was a good day.

Since then, she has had about three good days, with most of the others spent in bed during the day....angry and agitated with anyone in her path.  There have been a few days that I didn't visit...and she was so nasty today that I don't think I'll go tomorrow.

I have gone to one caregiver"s meeting held at BG..  It gave me more of an opportunity to meet and talk with other family members whom Ive seen there frequently but with whom I only had a nodding acquaintance.  And, as you might guess, their stories, concerns, questions were on a par with mine.  I think we will be able to offer moral support to each other and help each other out when needed. In any case, after the first meeting I concluded that my frequent visits may actually be slowing my mother's adjustment.  That, along with her current angry martyr behavior, has made it easier to "detach" a little.

Back to the 4th of July....the day didn't pass without celebrating with friends.  My friend Cheryl and her two roommates have a fabulous house right on the May River.  It's in a regular community (not a gated community) and the house itself is great......and they found it on craigslist!!  Anyway, it was a wonderful evening.  My "young friend", Gayle, and her husband Martin were there from New Jersey and we spent most of the evening catching up. She's a freelance writer and does some interesting things. The hostess, Cheryl, is the lady with the braid.  One of their neighbors had sprayed for mosquitos earlier in the day and the other put on a fireworks show that night.  There was about 15 minutes of humidity and then a breeze came up and made a perfect evening.  It was the first time I'd had a relaxing time with friends in a long time.

On July 2nd I went to the dentist to see if a filling had fallen out of my upper back tooth on the right side.  As it turns out, the silver filling had fracture the tooth; which, as I learned, is a fairly common thing. He deadened it, drilled out the filling and sent me down the street to have it removed by an oral surgeon. We concluded that the tooth might have had a lot to do with the sinus-infection-from-hell that I had sometime back.  Well, today I had the last tooth on the left side pulled.  It, too, fractured and actually came out in two pieces.  The dentist said he had only one other time seem this happen so quickly.....I'm hoping there are no more silver filling in my mouth!!

Monday I'm going to NC to arrange to have the items in my mother's house auctioned, the house cleaned and put on the market.  I'll get clothes that I think will be useful for my mother and a few sentiment items...small items.  She has a lovely, carved Duncan Phyfe sofa which I would like, but it really doesn't go with anything I have....I already have four sofas....and I would have to get it from there to here. I'm not looking forward to any of this but it has to be done as the  money is needed for her care.  Needless to say, she doesn't know about this or, somehow, she would be even more angry!  I will  be relieved when this part is over.

With all of this happening, I requested to have my jury duty postponed.  I explained things and said that I saw the need to do my civic duty but, considering the circumstances, I would like to do it when I could focus and think more clearly.  Thank goodness, they agreed!!

Now something to cheer you up after that dismal account!

And my personal favorite......