Friday, October 19, 2012

Things are Slowly Improving....

Wildlife scenes from our local paper....this is an Ibis (I think).
I'm still here and things are slowly improving, though I'm afraid to say that too loudly.  My mother has had four good days in a row........I've had two!  My mother's good turn is probably due to her meds.  She was prescribed 25 mg of Seroquel before all of this happened, but when she came out of the hospital, they reduced it to 12.5 mg (along with taking her off Ativan cold turkey and  Lunesta gradually).  After four days in bed complaining of everything and getting progressively agitated, I gave her the full dose again.  The doctor said it might be necessary as things progressed, and I determined we had reached that point.  After two days, she was out of bed and more "with it."  One of the nurses with Amedisys was amazed at the improvement and said it was the right thing to do......and it's nice to have things on a more even keel.

Osprey with catch.
As for me, I'm just bone tired.  Both last night, and as I'm writing this, I sat with a heating pad on my Ben Gay slathered neck and shoulders.  By the end of the day they feel totally locked and achy, with little mobility.  Though our weather has been great, I've only walked about 4 times in weeks, so my energy level is zero. Once I get going I can do pretty well; but, when I stop, the little energy I have evaporates.  Even so, as my mother shows improvement, I'm hoping for more normalcy, flexibility and relaxation.  Keep your fingers crossed!

Things have been like a three ring circus in that we have had a physical therapist in twice a week, a nurse twice a week and a speech therapist once a week. Even so, it is much easier than trying to get my mother to outside appointments.  They have all be helpful, kind and knowledgeable. It has also given me a lot of comfort to know they are here to call upon when needed.

As seems to be the pattern, I've had the revelation that things go easier for me (and possibly for my mother, too) if I stop trying to "fix" things that can't be fixed......or that depend on anyone else for it to happen.  The tendency is to want to fix whatever is going badly for those we love, but some things can't be fixed and it's best to acknowledge that rather than being caught up in trying to accomplish the impossible. The most I can do is make it as good a day as possible on any given day.  Like so many of these revelations, they seem clear and logical until caught up in the drama of the moment/crisis, and then they vanish into thin air.......but it's working for the time being.
The people in the background have to be tourists!!
In the midst of all this, I've done a will, Power of Attorney, Advance Directive and Health Power of Attorney for myself.  I know.  I know.......I should have done this long ago, but I'm just now getting around to it.  Everything is ready to be signed, notarized and witnessed next week.  I also managed to have lunch with a friend for the first time in a long time.....and it was great.  I got someone to come in and stay with Mama so I could really relax and enjoy the outing.

Politics also figure largely into my the point of having "picture in picture" on TV, MSNBC non-stop, etc.  I'm greatly relieved that the President showed up for the second debate and did well.  We're down to 18 or so days until Election Day and I don't know if I'll be able to stand it.  We mailed my mother's absentee ballot today, so that's one more thing out of the way.......and I'm thinking of voting early.  I can simply by virtue of my depressing is that?!?

Yesterday Mama was feeling better and needed some fresh air and exercise, so we took our chairs to the Church of the Cross and sat on the bluff overlooking the May River....pretty much the spot where this photo was taken.  My friend Cheryl is the person who took this beautiful sunset.  She's a kayaker and paddle-boarder and frequently posts some great photos on her Facebook page.  This one is especially nice.